Nothing I've Ever Known
by OctoberSand
Summary: REVISED! Zuko contemplates his relationship with Katara. Songfic, Zutara.


IT'S BEEN REVISED! Tell me what ya think. And I don't own Avatar.   
Nothing I've Ever Known **Right now I feel – just like a leaf on a breeze**

_**Who knows where it's blowin'**_

**Who knows where it's goin' **

Zuko had never been more confused. He felt like an insignificant raindrop, pelting and storming to please themthose he didn't know like he knew herThose he didn't love like he loved herHe didn't want to please them anymore. He didn't even want to please himself anymore. He just wanted to please herShe was all that mattered, all that would ever matter, in a world where everything was out of his power. He couldn't control the storm; he was just a raindrop. Ironically though, this raindrop had had the chance to rule the world, his own _empire._ But as she had told him, real power came when a man was willing to give it up.

_**I find myself somewhere I – I'd never thought I'd be**_

_**Going 'round in circles, yeah**_

_**Thinking about you and me**_

He'd spent what felt like hours pacing here, here in this little cave, in the middle of the Earth Kingdom, just waiting. Just waiting for herto come back. She had just needed some more water; she wouldn't be gone long. So he resigned himself to waiting. Restlessly, his thoughts wandered to his present situation. He'd never believed he'd be here six months ago. He'd never thought he'd be here, pacing, thinking, and deliberating with such nervous fervor. And all about her. Not just her, though. Them. The same conclusion always awaited him: _impossible_. However, since she came into his life, he'd learned to believe in the impossible, that truth is really stranger than fiction, and that miracles, even if they are insignificant as a butterfly getting its wings, happen every day. Funny how quickly and easily one girl can take everything you've learned, everything you've ever been taught, and everything you ever thought was _right _and turn it upside down.

_**And how do I explain it when I don't know what to say**_

_**What do I do now – so much has changed**_

Waiting for herlike this was torture. Except this wasn't physical torture, that he could handle, because compared to this almost insane desire to be with her, this mental torture he couldn't control, he could take anything. She was like a drug. He neededher here _now_, neededto feel her cool, soothing hand on his hot one, neededto feel her hair between his fingers, and neededto know she was alive and well. He had so many things he knew he had to say. They could part ways any day their alliance was so shaky. He knew he couldn't go on living if they separated and he hadn't explained to her he needed her like he needed the sun and she needed the moon. His thoughts however, were unintelligible. There was so much she needed to know about him, about them. She needed to know that all her questions and all her "what ifs" weren't just fantasies. She needed to know that they could come true, that he would make them come true just for herYet his mind was still devoid of anything to say that could ever convince her that it was true. What could he do? Everything about their "relationship" had changed. They had no chance in this world where everyone and everything were against them. But hadn't she been the one who taught him that your wildest dreams could come true?

_**Nothing I have ever known - has made me feel this way**_

**Nothing I have ever seen – has made me want to stay**

She had no idea the power she had over him, the absolute control and sway she wielded in her long, delicate, water - bending fingers. She was everything he was not, everything he'd never experienced. She made him feel in ways he'd never believed possible. He'd do anything she asked, anything. He closed his eyes, trying to keep from screaming as he continued to wait. He allowed his mind to wander, anything to get it off this infernal _waiting_. Home. The word came out of nowhere. How badly he used to want to go back! But now that he knew other possibilities, now that he had something that made him want to stay, maybe he didn't want to go back. He shook his head desperately. He couldn't think about home. So he let his thoughts meander again. This time, his mind led him to the memories of her. He could almost see the calm on her face as her beautiful hand traced his scar, staring at him with those eyes just like the sea at the South Pole where she came from. The light of judgment he was accustomed to when anyone saw his face never had surfaced in her eyes as long as he'd known her, not even when she her fingers were lightly brushing his mark of shame. She was the first person to ever touch his scar. And he wouldn't have wanted it any other way.

**Here I am – ready for you**

_**I'm torn 'n, I'm fallin', – I hear my home calling**_

_**Hey – I've never felt something so strong – oh no**_

_**It's like nothing I've ever known**_

At first she had just studied him, running her fingers slow and light over the muscle. All he could do was close his eyes, his senses taking over as he lost himself in her gentle and distinctly feminine touch. He never wanted to wake up from his bliss, this reliving of one his most precious memories. He just sat there, tracing the path of fiery water her fingers had left on his skin. Realization began to sink into him slowly. He could do it. He could make something real, something powerful with her. He wanted to acknowledge and take what had been an alliance and had somehow evolved into an almost friendship and turn into something real. He hadn't thought about having a friend, let alone something along the lines of girlfriend, since his mother disappeared. He knew he was broken and it wouldn't be easy. But that was the magic that was Katara. She could take your broken pieces and fix you. He couldn't remember ever feeling something so powerful as the emotions building in his chest at that moment. Yet he could still feel that distinct, nagging pull that was home. But _them_…this was new territory, new challenges, and new chances. Could he give up the beautiful infinites to return to a place that held nothing but the aching bitterness of loss?

_**Now you're the one I'm looking for**_

**You're the one I need**

_**You're the one that gives me – a reason to believe**_

There was just one thing bothering him: they couldn't have been more different. He was the Fire Nation prince. She was a peasant from the South Pole. But Fate hadn't liked things to be so unfair, so she exiled Zuko, taking his honor, his right to the throne, and what little affection his father had for him. Then she chose Katara to find the Avatar, become his friend, and travel with him. Not only were circumstances different, but also when one looked at just them as people, the differences were awe-inspiring. He channeled fire in the heat of day with the power and intensity of his emotions, she bent water by the light of the moon with a calmness of spirit he had never known. Her serene, steadiness of character balanced out his mood swings that were almost as uncontrollable as his fire. He came from the blistering and baking heat of the Fire Nation, her from the frigid and glacial ice of the South Pole. His pale, white skin was like alabaster snow compare to hers, which was dark and earth – toned. He was always dressed in ebony black and blood red, colors that inspired fear in countless hearts, her in dark, calming blues that seemed to hypnotize and attract. It all came down to their elements: fire and water. They couldn't have been more opposite. But fate was ever fickle. So she made her most outrageous, yet most believable axiom: opposites attract. Proof of this was that Katara was what he had been looking for all his life, the missing half of himself. He needed her like he needed air. Katara gave him reason to hope. Fate was _so _fickle.

_**Following a star – has lead to where you are**_

**It feels so strong now – this can't be wrong now**

And yet…Fate had brought them together. The first time he had ever seen her, and thought he would have never admitted it then, he'd been awed by her loyalty, her power, and her beauty. Often she'd disturbed his dreams. One moment he'd have the Avatar and the next those vast, ocean – indigo eyes would be staring into his, daring him to make just one more move as she fought for her friend. He'd awake in a sweat, panting just as she was about to drown his fire, his _life_ with her sinister water. He'd always feared water; its dark, suffocating nature haunted him like her transfixing eyes. Another miracle she had performed in him was to reveal to him that he feared what he didn't understand. So she helped him understand water and he helped her understand fire. This connected them deeper than either of them knew until now. He'd never experienced anything so powerful before. Never wanting to let this feeling go, he promised himself, and in a way her, she'd always be with him and he'd always love her, whether she chose to stay with him or not.

_**Nothing I have ever known – has made me feel this way**_

_**Nothing I have ever seen – has made me want to stay**_

_**Here I am – ready for you**_

A sudden constriction seemed to grip his heart at that thought. He couldn't breathe, he couldn't think. He took a deep calming breath, like when he was meditating. He couldn't think about her not being with him. The pain deep inside his chest that came whenever the biting reality of her having a choice to leave entered his head was just as unbearable as the waiting. She had to say with him. She had to choose him. He couldn't consider any other possibilities. Somewhere, deep down, he knew she felt as strongly about him as he did her. He wasn't good at reading Katara, hence the first time they'd tried to get along as people, he'd ended up frozen to the cave wall upside down and she barely moved out of the way in time when he melted the ice. But after some time had passed, the bruising fights had evolved into quiet laughter. He wanted to make something of his life, do something with their relationship. He was tired of waiting. He was ready.

_**I'm torn 'n, I'm fallin', – I hear my home calling**_

_**Hey – I've never felt something so strong – oh no**_

_**It's like nothing I've ever known**_

When she finally came in, he froze, all his former plans and words falling to ashes and turning to dust on his tongue. She was so exquisite, yet he had never met a girl who was made of tougher stuff than her. Her feet lightly slid across the floor towards him, her head up and eyes looking at him. He was hopelessly transfixed. The closer she came, the tighter his throat got, and the closer his heart got to leaping out his throat. He watched the worry slowly seep into Katara's eyes as she observed him tense as she drew closer.

" Zuko, are you all alright? I'm sorry I was gone longer than I planned, but I got distracted because there was—" she got no further. Zuko wrapped her in a suffocating embrace, never wanting to let her go. Tense for a moment, but relaxed the next, Katara simply hugged him back, taking his silence as a sign that something was bothering him and he simply needed to be comforted. He reluctantly let her go a few minutes later as her curiosity overcame her and she pulled away. Tilting her head to one side like an inquisitive puppy, she opened her mouth to ask him a question, but before a single word left her mouth, Zuko had moved again. Pulling her as close as before, he gently pressed his lips against hers, pouring all the emotions of the last few days into a simple kiss. Katara sensed the unbearable turmoil and undying passion and took a deep breath, as if taking it all upon her. Pulling away only few moments later, he leaned his forehead again hers, brushing the hair away from her face, both of them breathing in perfect sync. Just staring into her blue eyes, hearing the in and out of her breathing, seeing the never ending rising and falling of her chest as she pulled the air in and pushed it back out caused him to involuntarily shudder and a rush of heat to consume him. Leaning close to her, he whispered brokenly,

" I missed you so much…"

She was nothing he'd ever known. 

Well, there's the revised version. I like it better. Hope you like it too.


End file.
